Real Story: Chronicles of "hoe-bag"

So, I started my freshman year at college, excited to meet my roommate. I had moved in several days before the standard freshman move-in day, because I was to be trained for working on campus. My roommate arrives - with about a U-Haul's worth of CRAP. Pretty soon, my side of the room was nearly overtaken. That aside, I moved on and tried to be friends with my roommate.

Our rooms are set up "suite" style - 2 rooms connected by a kitchen/bathroom. I became good friends with my one suitemate quickly; trying to become friends with my roommate was quite the opposite. My roommate admitted within the first day that "she doesn't get along well with other girls." No explanation - just that. She had some sort of boyfriend of 5 years, but absolutely loved to hang all over the guys across the hall AND my suitemate's boyfriend. Ok. So she's a flirt. Well it only goes downhill from there...

My roommate had apparently been a little sheltered in high school and didn't do much drinking. Well, she really started to hit the sauce once she hit college. She'd drink on weeknights -whenever. She always went to bed incredibly late and never seemed to want to turn off her obnoxiously loud alarm clock in the morning. One morning, her alarm clock was blasting as usual. I was in the bathroom drying my hair, and I could still hear the stupid thing plain as day. This continued for about 5 minutes. Next thing I know, I heard my suitemates' door open and then our door open. The alarm clock was silenced, and both the opened doors slammed shut. My hair dry, I walked back into my room, and my bleary eyed roommate said ever so nicely "did you shut off my f***ing alarm clock? what's your problem? F***ing wake me up before you do it!" I said uhh... no, I was in the bathroom. So, she stomps over to the other room, flings open the door and starts giving my suitemate her unholy wrath of terror concerning "her stuff" and how it should "not be touched" and shut the door so hard she broke it. She stomps past me and crawls back into bed. Ahh, what a lovely demeanor.

Over the next several months, she became a raging bi*ch with myself and my suitemates. She didn't clean her messes, she was always sick, played music at 3 am, screwed around with a countless number of guys, and just did a number of stupid things. The one thing that really got me was that she never washed her hands after going to the bathroom or when she was sick and sneezing and coughing up stuff. Soon, myself and my suitemates also got ill from her. It got to the point where I had to follow her around with Lysol, spraying everything she touched. She didn't wash her sheets for six months straight - this was gross, because her pillow had makeup stains all over it, and just her general disgustingness from being sick and hungover all the time. She enjoyed having random guys over on weeknights (usually 4 out of 5 weeknights) and kept her music and lights on until 3 sometimes 4 am. She listened to only rap and R&B. And she loved to play the same songs over and over again and insult basically anything I listened to (I listen to all genres of music - I'm very open-minded).

Near the end of the year, I didn't stay in the room much - I had gotten extremely fed up with her b/s. I would come in in the mornings and she would have guys over from the night before. Many were from one particular frat house. I had to walk in one morning and see one of them naked. Not cool. The day before move-out day, I went home with the last of my stuff and planned to come back the next day and clean up my side of the room & clear out the fridge. I walked into the room to find the trash can filled with my remaining stuff - toiletries and my food and beverages from the fridge. Also, I found several piles of dirty paper towels layign on my bed and around the room. She had not made any attempt to clean her side of the room, and had left messes in the bathroom. I was MAD. I'm normally calm but wow did I really want to strangle her. She had left some of her belongings in the room to be picked up later - my guess is that she spent the night in one of her many boy toy's rooms. I filled her good Columbia jacket with dirty paper towels, and emptied several bottles of ketchup, mustard and the other spoiled stuff that had been so nicely tossed in the trash can. I cannot tell you how GOOD that felt to get revenge on the roommate from HELL!